I am starting over…
Recollecting all the crushed spirit…
Severing all the fake bonds I used to have…
Learning from all the experiences I’ve had…
Asking forgiveness for all the bad I’ve done…
Leaving behind all the vitriol-inflicting things one by one…
Hoping that a future radiant enough will be available for me…
Believing that this journey will lead me to a place I can refer to as home…
-Wira Kirros, trying to start everything over-
Some people are to greedy to be thankful of what they actually have. They have a shiny ruby in their clutch, but as they see other stone, they let go of the ruby only to find out that the stone that they see is actually nothing precious. As they go back to retrieve the ruby they leave earlier, they should come to accept the fact that the ruby is no more theirs. I used to be one of those people. I used to have a precious ruby in my possession, but I thought it was not good enough. So, I let go of it and tried to grasp for another stone, and as I came to realization, I have lost my ruby…
Today’s moral lesson: Be thankful of what you have today, be grateful that some people actually care about you, and don’t let go…
Okay, today’s a short one… GBU!
-Wira Kirros, letting go of one of his regrets-
Someone back then told me, “Praw, as a Christian, you lack of something very fundamental, you lack of love”. Since then, eight years have past. Looking back
into those words thrown at me eight years ago, today I can proudly say, “Those words are no more meant for me.” Well, yes indeed, I don’t possess so many talents as you guys do, I am not trusted into a lot of matters just as you guys are, and things, but one thing for sure, I never treat my juniors and my brethren as nuisance. No matter what people might say, I cherish them all. Taking this into account, I throw those words back at you guys, “The ones lacking love are actually you guys”. With this, I want to thank you guys for all the patience withstanding me while regarding me as nuisance.
From now on, I won’t be of any nuisance anymore… and from today on, the people I used to admire are already “dead”. That’s all. Satisfied? Your deal!
-Wira Krros, trying to sever every false bond he used to have back then-
4 AM
now, still cannot sleep… dude!
Today’s
post will deal with something like rejection… consulted the dict (read: dictionary) and found this definition on rejection: “act of rejecting”. Definition wise, it is quite simple. However, this definition isn’t really defining. I mean, to what extend could an act be referred as rejecting? You can be nice to some people but you might still be rejecting that person by just maintaining a shallow relationship. You can say you’re someone’s friend and reject him the very same time by excluding him from your mental peer. There are actually a lot of ways to reject some people. Be grateful to God that some people are either too kind or too ignorant that they won’t realize a single thing… however, some people do realize it, you know?
What I want to state here is that, I’m tired of this. Saying that we’re
friends, acting that nice and friendly, oh, dude! Drop the crap! I don’t necessitate such bullshit. If you don’t like me that much, then there is no need to try to maintain this kind of spurious and stupid fellowship.
My point is, I’m used to this, okay? And I don’t think there’s even any meaning for us to keep this all along. Let’s just stop this. Let’s get some relief for us all… I mean, don’t you think sometimes it’s tiring just to pretend? As for me, yes! It’s indeed tiring. I’m tired of pretending being innocent, trying to act as if I don’t have a clue of what’s happening while I actually know… you know what? I’m actually glad that you guys stop spamming that rubbish… things have been quite convenient since then…
p.s.:
to some of my lovely friends… you know what? You guys haven’t been any lovely even a bit. In contrast, you guys have been like… I dunno, jerk? Yeah, guess so. So what’s with all the time we’ve had together? Oh, come on… I was just pretending there. So, this is the stuff. You guys are jerk, I am a jerk, and we make a real bad team here… no, no, no… it’s not like I hate you guys, it’s
just… I don’t like you guys and I don’t like the way you guys do your stuff, that’s all! So, let’s put this to an end, kay? Thanks!
4.30
AM already… still restless… dang…
-Wira Kirros, with his bile altogether-
Just some days ago, I watched this awesomely animated series called Blassreiter. Well, the story talks about some being, that is believed to be the final evolution form of human, namely Amalgam. The thing is that, these Amalgams don’t always have human reason. Some attack humans mercilessly, some others try their best to suppress the wild instinct that has started to take root, and few still maintain their reason living to destroy other Amalgams.
Now, one of the main characters here, whose name is Joseph, is an Amalgam. However, without knowing how, he is able to maintain his reason. Therefore, he refrains from killing humans. Still, some people just can’t stand an Amalgam. Oh, come on! Watch the movie, and you’ll know why (basically it is simply because Amalgam is like some beastly monster). And, uh… so, some people, especially those who are involved in some Amalgam-hunting organization, always try to terminate Joseph, without caring why. To me, there is simply one
reason existing here. These people are simply blinded by something… and what is that? Differences! Is that so? For time being, let’s go on…
Then, in the very same story, we have Malek, a small child from foreign
country who is adopted by some German lady. So, what’s happening with him? Pitiful Malek has to endure some hardship as his schoolmates bully him everyday. They hit him, saying that Malek is a demon, drawing some weird demonic mark on Malek’s hand, and stuff. Why? Why do they do that to him? Simply becos’ Malek is different. He’s no German, that’s why. So, what’s the problem here? To your disappointment, differences! Seems like this “differences” issue can stir up some serious problems, eh? Shortly speaking, this Blassreiter talks a dang lot about this differences issue. Hmm… quite nice for an animated series ^^ Okay, move on!
It’s not too nice for me to come up with this question, but, eh… what about churches? The very churches that have been preaching about love, faith, God, salvation, sin, equality, and stuff, what about ‘em? Do they have something to do with this issue? To all Christians, to all Christian wannabes, and to all who are simply not Christian, I’m sorry for what I have to say afterward. Too bad, but
during the twelve years I’ve spent going to churches, differences has been a very disheartening issue in churches… ethnicity, languages, physical appearance, talents, social state, riches, these things really count in churches… well, okay! We know that those who dwell in churches are not angelic beings, they are simply sinful humans, so, it’s pretty sensible if they somehow succumb to sins, we know that! Oh, okay… sorry for bringing up this lame excuse. Anyway, this is the truth. We cannot simply deny it.
So, what am I trying to say? I dunno. I am tired… so many things happen, so many problems take place around me, so many facts shock me and zap me out of my insanity. I just have no more to say… I just hope for some peace… peace that would last forever… but I know it’s just impossible… dude, Heaven is still far away, eh? Taku…
p.s.: watch Blassreiter! Great animation, good design, detailed background,
awesome plot, fantastic concept, “tickling” issue, etc… you won’t regret it, believe me!
