Blue Ballad

Do you
guys read the topic above? What is this about then? GRATITUDE? Yeah,
you got it right. Heh? No, no, no… I am conscious, totally
conscious. Now, why should I discuss about gratitude when the topic
itself is about high fever? Well, I am currently having a very high
fever. Believe me, this fever is harsh. Head is heavy, body is
burning, limbs are freezing, feel like vomiting, difficult to move
this body, haven’t eaten properly (even if I eat, those foods just
seem tasteless), breath stinks, somehow can’t get proper sleep, and
stuff. Then, what do these all have to do with gratitude? Now,
everything started last Monday, when I was having a class with native
Japanese person (a bijin I should say ^^). She told me how
during winter, homeless people in Japan will usually have their body
frozen. Blood just can’t reach all of the vessels in their body due
to the extreme temperature. What will happen next? Next, their
fingers, ears, or nose will get rotten. After that, those parts will
crumble like snow.

I want
to compare myself a little bit with those homeless people. My illness
is indeed harsh. Unending rain just worsen the situation. However, it
is a very factual fact that I am still more fortunate compared to
those. I am not frozen to death. I still have my fingers, ears, nose,
and whatsoever. Shortly speaking, being born in Indonesia, leading
this kind isn’t bad at all. There are a lot more things that I can
be grateful of, aren’t they? Now, how many of you guys wish that
you guys were born in some other countries, instead of Indonesia? You
know what guys? You guys are actually fortunate to be born in
Indonesia. I have a lot of friends who have been abroad, and most of
them told me that Indonesia is simply the best country in the world.
In short, guys, be grateful for being who you are.

Then,
let’s talk about a higher level of gratitude. Let’s first try
this question, what should you do if you take a look around and find
yourself being, the most unfortunate one? Could you then be grateful?
Must be very difficult, eh? That’s why, we need to learn not to
depend our gratitude on someone’s situation. The highest level of
gratitude talks about God and you. Just forget about everything else,
just stop thinking about everybody else, just look at yourself, and
God. Having faith that God’s providence will suffice is what brings
you to that level of gratitude.

Now, I
might be a very small part of this world. Some people might think
that a sole Wira won’t just change anything. Well, yes, I am indeed
very small compared to this world. Right now, this very second, I can
hear the plane is flying high above the sky. Some Gita Gutawa’s
lover here (read: my neighbour) is still happily singing her song.
That shows enough how small I am compared to this world, but I don’t
want to end up bringing no change in this world. In fact, I want to
give this world, this vast and enormous world, an influence. I want
you guys to have faith in everything I write here. I want us to learn
together, to learn how to have that highest level of gratitude. Naïve
enough, but who cares? I’m a dreamer though ^^ dry up here, GBU
folks!

“My salad days, when I was green in judgement…” -William Shakespeare-

There was time when we could be irresponsible. There was time when we were selfish and ignorant. There was time when we foolishly chased for stupid ideals. There was time when we were blinded by things which were visible to our eyes. There was time when we carelessly picked the wrong decision. There was time when we easily misunderstood things. Yeah… there was indeed a time when we were that green and immature.

I have spent more or less 23 years on this earth, under this very blue sky. Those 23 years were miraculous to me. So many fateful encounters occurred. So many wonderful experiences took place. God, family, friends, music, and stuff, they have coloured my life magnificently. If I unfurl my life, I can see a lot of colours. Some are bright, some are gloomy, yet they enrich my life beautifully. The every single bit of happiness I’ve collected up to today, all the wrong that I’ve done, they all have led me to this new path, and as I move my life along, I can see that I’m no more alone.

Youth is indeed wonderful. All the coincidences, all the phenomena, and all the people in it, everything… they can mean more than something. I just know things can’t stay this way forever and that is why, I want to cherish every single moment I can grasp while hoping that maturity will come along as I go on…

Man, what’s happening with me lately? Being this blue without even knowing what’s really happening, eh? Dude, I love this stupid life…

Note: salad days means the period of a person’s life when he or she is young, innocent, naïve, and inexperienced.

“If you close your eyes and think about the world, what do you see?”

Lenalee, a character from a Japanese animated series, namely D.Gray-man, asks this question. Then, she starts on babbling on how she can only see her friends’ face and how she thinks that her friends are her only world for her. She doesn’t care about the “real world” at all. All she really cares about are her friends, which at the same time, are her world. This question bugs me a bit. I mean, in a certain way, she is correct. Think about this vast world, is this world really the world for us?

No one can deny that we, humans, in some way create our own world in which we can live in.

Some people create a huge enormous wall called riches to be their world. Simultaneously, that world limits them from being in the harsh world called poverty. Some other people who are courting design a very small world in which only they and their partners can coexist inside. Well, we might have some others creating and designing their own world. However, the big question here is, what’s happening to those people and their world?

Now, whether we like it or not, people can just live and fight for their own world. Honestly, global warming issues are spreading like fire nowadays, but why don’t people care? Because, this world simply isn’t their world. They have their own. People who have riches as their world won’t care a single bit if this world crumbles as long as he can gather more riches. People who are courting won’t give a damn ‘bout this world as long as their partner is happy. Then, in what world are we really living in?

Well, let’s just forget ‘bout the previous talk. Let’s drop all those talks ‘bout global warming and people with their own world. Let’s just talk ‘bout me. Lately, I’ve been thinking, what is the world to me? If I close my eyes and think about the world, what will I see? This question seems very hard to answer. Some people might know that I am a music freak, but, is music really the world to me? Some other people always believe that I’m quite a flirtatious person toward some sweet girls, but, are sweet girls the world to me? Some others are just aware that friends and family are precious to me, but are they the world to me? I just don’t know. I mean, I can’t just imagine this world without music, sweet girls, friend, or family. However, if we think clearly, what is this “world” really is? I think the easiest answer might be “something most precious”. If we take this answer as our definition, thing might be easier. If I close my eyes and think about the world, what will I see? Honestly, for time being, I can say that people that are dear to me, they are my world. I think I can live without music (or maybe not ^^), and I can live without sweet girls (oh, really? –grin-), but without people who are dear to me, there is no way I can survive.

Yah, basically I just want to show my appreciation here. I’ve been through a lot and there’s n way I can make it here without friends and family. I’m glad I have these many friends, am glad having these many people to watch my back while I’m running pursuing my dreams. Those doubts and pride I used to have, I had thrown ‘em away since I met these people. Folks, thanks for being great friends and family. Let’s stay keen and cool, set your eyes on the future ahead, and let’s run together. I just know that we can make it together…