Blue Ballad

I
read this on the news some previous time ago. So, there was this
person in Berlin who worked as an employee in a certain bank. Then,
it seems like this person loved to play some Robin Hood role play and
therefore, he often transferred some money from rich person’s
account to the poor’s account. Basically, he already did that for
five years or so before he finally made a sudden confession on his
deed. Later, he used up his riches to pay for what he had done so
that the bank “ONLY” lost 640 thousand pounds (yeah, which is
actually not an ONLY, for me especially…). Finally, this person
ends up sentenced to some two-year imprisonment.

Whew!
Quite a deed, eh? I was in a great surprise when I first read it and
for some time I was like… amazed! I mean, come on! What kind of age
do you think you are living in? We’re living in an age in which
money has been a very great standard and the greatest value for
everyone. Therefore, I really didn’t expect that such person
existed. I was sorta keyed up when I read this. I mean, my family has
been brainwashing me with the idea of the equation in which being
successful is equal to getting a hell lot of money. And to your
disappointment, for me, such equation is just another bullshit made
up by blinded foolish people.

Now,
come on! Let’s get real here! Money can get you to some cozy place,
it can give you a bunch of pleasures, it can even lie into truth!
Tempting, isn’t it? With such power, there is no wonder if people
keep on aiming at fortune as their goal. People start to compete with
each other. When they find a dead end, they start to think of some
other way, some other “filthy” way, I mean. Then, after a short
while, they start to backstab each other. After such process, without
even realizing it, they lose the ability to trust others. Now, lemme
tell you something. This kind of stuff has done quite something for
us, and what is that? Dunno? Come on! You have to know! Well, I’ll
ask once again, WHAT THE DANG HECK IS THAT? The answer is that this
kind of situation has kept the world go “soaring”. Magnificent,
isn’t it? Thanks to this blindfolded-by-money people, we have the
crime rate soaring, then we have the broken family rate soaring. Oh,
have I mentioned about the rise in poverty? Now, don’t you deny
this. Some of you blind people might have even experienced this. Am I
rite? Hell, yeah!

Let us
then think for a while, who do you think are the happiest people in
the world? That all rich-but-miserable Princess Diana? Bullshit! The
extremely famous-but-ended-up-killing-himself Elvis Presley? There’s
another bullshit for you! Just for your information, without
discrediting all the rich people in the world, one of the happiest
people in the world might be Mother Teressa, one who devoted herself
to serve other people. Another might be Martin Luther who lived
holding his faith firm and taught it to others during his whole life.
Some others might be the people around you who work for you day and
night just to make sure that one day you will survive this society.

Happiness
is not the matter of being rich, being able to have power and all the
luxurious stuff in the world. Happiness is about having someone to
cherish and being able to do so. How? How can we achieve it? When you
have kindness and love in your heart, I’m sure you’ll be able to
do so. That’s all. Going for my fried rice. Catch ya another time!
GBU!

‘Holiday’s
blues’, that’s what Raras said about my condition right now - a
condition in which you are having a holiday in your hometown and find
it extremely difficult to leave it due to certain reasons… that’s
how we define it, holiday’s blues. 

Now, I
don’t like this. I mean, I have a dang lot of tasks waiting for me
ahead in Yogyakarta and I don’t think I can do ‘em well with this
kind of state. My heart is simply not in the state of working
everything out. I want to stay here longer… in Jakarta, there are
too many people I cannot leave here. It’s like… I still want to
be with ‘em, praying for ‘em while watching them developing
slowly. Dude, life is harsh… time is cunning… and above all,
being melancholic is sick! I don’t like this. I should actually
leave this city with some kind of satisfaction that I have done some
good deeds for my little brothers and sisters here, but no! There are
things I still want o say to ‘em, there are things I still want to
share to ‘em! And not being able to do so makes me kind of… yeah,
holiday’s blues.

Well,
I don’t want to be a crybaby here, meaning that whatever happens,
life should just go on, rite? I don’t want to make this en excuse
for later failure (doesn’t necessarily mean that I am expecting
failure here). No matter in what condition I am, my principals won’t
falter. I will perform all my tasks professionally and perfectly.
‘Til my death, I won’t go against my own words. Once I decide to
put my all into something, then there will be no more excuse left for
me. I have been a role model for some people this whole time and I
won’t let them see their role model going down like some nuts. The
perfectionist and professional me will remain the same forever. That
and that alone!

…
okay, some of you guys reading this post and willing to pray for me,
please do! As for now, I will need more and more support… will dry
up here! GBU!

-was written several hours before I left for Yogyakarta on the 4th of July-