Blue Ballad

I
couldn’t be any happier than now. Throughout my life, I have thrown
away a lot of stuff to carry on living. I have thrown away a year
during my study in UI (Indonesian University); I have thrown my
comfort by going to a city I haven’t known before; I have thrown
away all the joy that I might keep on feeling if I only had chosen to
stay in Jakarta instead; I have also thrown away the opportunity to
live an easier life by not taking IT or stuff such as that as my
major, and above all, I have thrown away my ego which had been the
only way for me to define myself. Some people may think I may regret
this, some other may think that I have chosen a very foolish
decision. However, I really have no regret. They are all worthy for
what I currently possess right now.

I
have been thinking ‘bout life and there’s really no feeling other
than gratitude that can express what I am feeling right now. I am
grateful that I chose to go to this city back then resulting in my
meeting with quite a numbers of wonderful friends. Think I should say
thanks to some of my friends here and that will include Dede. Thanks
for being willing to support my ministry. The next thanks should go
to Vania for being a very nice friend to chat with. You are really
something, buddy! You are a bit crazy, though, but that might be what
I like about you ^_^ Then, Yason for being a very insane friend of
mine. This Yason is actually heck too unpredictable. The quality of
everything that he lets out of his mouth really depends on his mood.
That’s Yason anyway. After that, I also want to thank a friend who
has gone to Jakarta for being a very great companion back then when
she was still in this city. Thanks a dang lot, you guys have been
quite invaluable friends for me.

I am also grateful that I keep on grasping my idealism. Being able to
do so, this very moment, God has given me the chance to cherish the
person I love the most. Yes, indeed I can’t do everything for her.
However, this oath I should take; as long as I am alive, the very
least thing I can do for her, I will do. Sound like bullshit? Yup, it
sounds so to me as well. However, note this, guys! If you can’t
take an oath for the sake of the one you love the most, then, for
whom else you can do so? For yourself? Nah, it’s just sick! Ah,
whatever! I don’t care ‘bout your business anyway :p

Now, what I am really trying to say is that, never throw away your
idealism! You may look foolish that way. Bringing this idealism alone
may never be able to guarantee you that you will survive this harsh
life. Yup, but can a realistic view be able to? Nope either. So?
What’s the big deal? If you can’t have any guarantee either way,
why bother with just a plain standard realistic life? I say, grab
that idealistic life and be happy with your decision. Up to this day,
there’s no bit of regret or remorse that occupies my heart. There’s
just this overflowing feeling of gratitude that floods my heart with
happiness every each new day. Wonderful? Indeed! Too bad I can’t
describe how it tastes, you guys won’t understand anyway. The only
way for you guys to understand it is to experience it yourself. So,
just bugger off and throw yourself to your journey of life!

        Yup,
this is it, the end to another of my purposeless writing. Huff… if
I ponder a bit, I might look very foolish right now. I used to think
that to think logically is the best way to achieve happiness, but I
was wrong. Sometimes, there’s joy that you can have only by leading
a foolish life. Maybe it is right when some people say, “Out of all
people that you may encounter in this world, the most foolish one
might be the wisest one.” Hah! There have just been a heck lot of
contradictions these days. But, who cares? As long as the happiness
rules! Aa… should stop here. Well, gotta take my leave. C ya around
guys! GBU! 

This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 10th, 2006 at 6:31 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.